That's Jokes
-
Thought you'd like that one @Giles, I thought it had a similar appeal to the "best pub" joke…
-
Skinny little man in the elevator
A skinny little man goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little dude staring up at him, so he says to him, "7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pounds of testicles, Turner Brown." The little man faints and falls to the floor. The big guy kneels down and brings him to, shaking the little guy. In a weak voice the little pipsqueak says, "What EXACTLY did you say to me?" The big guy says, "I saw your curious look and figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me…I'm 7 feet tall, I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 pounds and my name is Turner Brown."
The little guy stutters, "T-T-T-Turner Brown?? Sweet Jesus, I thought you said 'Turn around'!!"
-
Al old married couple go to the doctor because their memory isn't what it used to be and they've become really forgetful. The doctor suggests they write things down to help them remember. Later on the wife asks the husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. He says sure. She says write it down you'll forget. He says I won't forget. She says I also want whipped cream on it. She says,once again, write it down. He says no problem I got this. She says I want a cherry on top also. She says again write it down. He says I got it ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry. He goes into the kitchen and comes out a half hour later smiling with a plate of bacon and eggs. She looks at him and says…Where's the toast?
-
@endo This reminded me of your recent brush with traffic enforcement:
-
@Matt Ever come across letters like these when you were an insurance guy?
-
@EdH i have gotten hundreds, at least, of every variety of angry, confused, frustrated, and batshit nutty correspondence over the past 23 years but the truly inspired ones from those detached from our plane of reality always come written or typed on paper for some reason. I’ve definitely seen some good ones.
yeah, very much so, btw haven't heard of them since, but ...