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    Iron Heart Fall/Winter 2025 Collection Preview - Now Live

    That's Jokes

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    • mclaincauseyM
      mclaincausey
      見習いボス
      Joined:

      LOL @popvulture that is the wookiest joke I've heard all day 😃

      Think it, be it.

      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • popvultureP
        popvulture
        見習いボス
        Joined:

        Hahahaha — I mean, the odds of him being dressed like a wookie while telling me that joke were quite high. I'm surprised he wasn't, to be honest.

        WTB
        IHSH-IHG-BLK XXL
        Sugar Cane Coke Stripe SS L charcoal

        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • mclaincauseyM
          mclaincausey
          見習いボス
          Joined:

          By "wook," I mean a colloquial term for a dirty hippie (which originates from their often Chewbacca-esque appearance).

          Think it, be it.

          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • popvultureP
            popvulture
            見習いボス
            Joined:

            Hahaha I'm using that — I thought you'd tied it into May the Fourth (but alas that was yesterday)

            WTB
            IHSH-IHG-BLK XXL
            Sugar Cane Coke Stripe SS L charcoal

            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • endoE
              endo
              見習いボス
              Joined:

              (WIFI = Wurst Iz Fery Importänt)

              … ready for the weekend?

              si tacuisses

              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • popvultureP
                popvulture
                見習いボス
                Joined:

                We're gonna be down to just one or two bars by the time I'm done with those.

                WTB
                IHSH-IHG-BLK XXL
                Sugar Cane Coke Stripe SS L charcoal

                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • GilesG
                  Giles
                  IHUK Crew
                  Joined:

                  Does anyone know how to get to Penrith?

                  "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                  • steelworkerS
                    steelworker
                    見習いボス
                    Joined:

                    I'm reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is going to happen.. I can feel it.

                    Those are my principles, and if you don't like them…
                    Well, I have others.

                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • KasiK
                      Kasi
                      見習いボス
                      Joined:

                      Giles let me know where you are there lol [emoji23]

                      Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

                      The world's insane
                      While you drink champagne
                      And I'm livin' in black rain 4Q 🖕

                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • goosehdG
                        goosehd
                        Mod Squad
                        Joined:

                        Ventriloquist
                        He's a ventriloquist walking around the countryside.
                        A storm is coming, driving rain is falling on him. He sees a farm. The peasant welcomes him and even offers him a snack. Once the good weather returns, the ventriloquist tells himself that to thank his host, he will use his artistic skills.

                        He goes to a hen and makes her talk:

                        "How is your life on the farm"?

                        "Well, he steals my eggs in the morning but that's fine"

                        Then the turn of the cow.

                        "How is your life on the farm?"

                        "I'm also fine despite the fact that he touches my udders every morning and steals my milk."

                        As he walks towards a goat, the feverish peasant exclaims:

                        "Don't listen to her, she's a liar"

                        "I don't give a shit what anyone else is doing, we will do what is best for us and our customers" - Giles P. :)

                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • GilesG
                          Giles
                          IHUK Crew
                          Joined:

                          "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • goosehdG
                            goosehd
                            Mod Squad
                            Joined:

                            That's f'n funny!!!  😃

                            "I don't give a shit what anyone else is doing, we will do what is best for us and our customers" - Giles P. :)

                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • endoE
                              endo
                              見習いボス
                              Joined:

                              👍🏻 such a prick

                              si tacuisses

                              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • EdHE
                                EdH
                                Iron Heart Deity
                                Joined:

                                A Scotsman, and Englishman, and an Irishman are comparing their local pubs.

                                "At McTavish's place, The Full Haggis in Aberdeen, McTavish will buy your fifth pint every time you buy four. It's the best deal going!"

                                "No" says the Englishman. "The Red Lion in London is the best pub around. So much history, it's an icon, and every 3rd pint is on the house for us regulars!"

                                "Ah dat's nothin" says the Irishman "at my local, in Kilkenny, they'll buy you one drink, then another, all the drinks you can manage really. Then when you're done drinking they'll take you upstairs and make sure that you get laid all night long!"

                                "Bullshit" say the other two. "Did this actually happen to you?"

                                "Well, not to me, no" the Irishman admits, "but it's happened to me sister a bunch o' times!"

                                Take the dive...

                                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • J
                                  Jett129
                                  見習いボス
                                  Joined:

                                  As I was reading,I was wondering where’s he going with this? Good one.

                                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • GilesG
                                    Giles
                                    IHUK Crew
                                    Joined:

                                    Brilliant…..

                                    "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • goosehdG
                                      goosehd
                                      Mod Squad
                                      Joined:

                                      Older and Wiser

                                      An old Doberman starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a young lion heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

                                      The old Doberman thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now! Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.

                                      Just as the lion is about to leap, the old Doberman exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious lion! I wonder, if there are any more around here?

                                      Hearing this, the young lion halts his attack in mid-stride, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!," says the lion, "That was close! That old Doberman nearly had me!

                                      Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the lion. So, off he goes.

                                      The squirrel soon catches up with the lion, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the lion. The young lion is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!

                                      Now, the old Doberman sees the lion coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet.

                                      Just when they get close enough to hear, the old Doberman says, "Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another lion!

                                      Moral of This Story
                                      Don't mess with the old dogs. Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery! Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.

                                      "I don't give a shit what anyone else is doing, we will do what is best for us and our customers" - Giles P. :)

                                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • ARNCA
                                        ARNC
                                        啓蒙家
                                        Joined:

                                        As that Larkin poem came up after a recent UHHH, I thought you might enjoy this from today’s Times:

                                        “Every day that you survive you get a free sunset“

                                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • steelworkerS
                                          steelworker
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                                          Joined:

                                          that's great @ARNC  😃 😃

                                          Those are my principles, and if you don't like them…
                                          Well, I have others.

                                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • J
                                            Jett129
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                                            Joined:

                                            Reminds me of a Mitch Hedberg quote…"I used to do drugs,I still do,but I used to"

                                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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