That's Jokes
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A dentist noticed that his next patient, an older woman, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.
'No, I don't,' she replied.
'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, Then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'
She didn't crack a smile.
'Oh, well.. I tried,' he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
'What's so funny?' he asked.
'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'
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He must be a colonial
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Shane Gillis has a new hour up on Netflix. There’s a George Washington skit in there that details how he was able to defeat the British; KILLS
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A husband takes his wife to a disco.
There’s a guy on the dance giving it large - break dancing, moonwalking, back flips, the works.The wife turns to her husband and says “ see that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down.”
Husband says “ looks like he’s still fucking celebrating!”
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I get that these clips are selected rather than representative, but all the same...
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A Dominican and a Jesuit were chain smokers. Both were eager to be allowed to smoke while performing their devotions, but needed to gain permission from a higher authority. ‘I tried asking the Prior, but he was dead against it,’ said the Dominican.
‘What did you ask, precisely?’ enquired the Jesuit.
‘Well, I asked him whether it was acceptable to smoke while I was praying.’
‘Wrong question,’ replied the Jesuit. ‘I asked my Abbot whether I could pray while I was smoking. Permission granted.’
(Hat tip to an article in The Spectator.)
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I have a lot of respect for Jeselnik as a writer, and for pushing the boundaries of human decency to their limits, but I can't help but find his full sets a little tiresome as every single joke follows the same formula.
Really wish he could incorporate just a little bit of long form storytelling into his act..
