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    Iron Heart Fall/Winter 2025 Collection Preview - Now Live

    That's Jokes

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    • J
      Jett129
      見習いボス
      Joined:

      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • ROmanR
        ROman
        Haraki san Prodigy
        Joined:

        A woman goes into a tackle shop to buy a fishing rod and reel for her grandson's birthday.

        She doesn't know which one to get, so she just takes a mid priced one and goes over to the counter.

        The salesman is standing there wearing dark glasses.

        She says, excuse me. I'm looking for a gift for my 10 year old grandson and wonder whether this would be a good buy as his first rod/reel.

        He says Madam, I'm completely blind, but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.

        She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.

        He says, that's a two metre Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 5-kg test line. It's a good all around combination, ideal for a first rod / reel and your in luck as it's on sale this week for only $43.99.

        She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it." As she opens her purse, she doesn't notice as her Visa card drops on the floor. Oh it sounds like you've dropped your credit card, says the salesman and it sounds to me like a Visa.

        Amazed by the acuity of his hearing she bends down to pick up the card and in doing so accidently farts. At first she is really embarrassed but then realizes there is no way the blind salesman could tell it was her who had farted.

        The salesman rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $58.48 please."

        The woman is totally confused by this and asks, Didn't you just tell me it was on sale for $43.99? How did it suddenly become $58.50?

        The salesman replies, The duck caller is $10.99 and the fish bait is $3.50.

        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • gaseousclayG
          gaseousclay
          Joined:

          duck caller [emoji23]

          Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

          WTB:
          IHSH-129 size L (blue)
          IHSH-19

          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • J
            Jett129
            見習いボス
            Joined:

            Great joke!!!

            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • GilesG
              Giles
              IHUK Crew
              Joined:

              Boom….

              "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • bryaneidins70B
                bryaneidins70
                Iron Heart Deity
                Joined:

                'Fail we may…Sail we must'

                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • J
                  Jett129
                  見習いボス
                  Joined:

                  One of my all time favorite jokes. I tell a little bit different version,but the punchline is the same.

                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • organisysO
                    organisys
                    Raw and Unwashed
                    Joined:

                    😃

                    Pride of Japan :-)

                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • GilesG
                      Giles
                      IHUK Crew
                      Joined:

                      I may have posted this one before, if so, I'm not even sorry… 😃 😃 😃 😃

                      "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • J
                        Jett129
                        見習いボス
                        Joined:

                        Love that joke,makes me laugh every time.

                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • motojoboboM
                          motojobobo
                          啓蒙家
                          Joined:

                          The journey is the objective.

                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • J
                            Jett129
                            見習いボス
                            Joined:

                            Any Mitch Hedberg fans?

                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • J
                              Jett129
                              見習いボス
                              Joined:

                              This is from his last set before the lockdown in March.

                              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • motojoboboM
                                motojobobo
                                啓蒙家
                                Joined:

                                Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time & decided that in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to
                                share office space…

                                Dr.Smith was a psychiatrist & Dr.Jones
                                was a Proctologist (related to colon, anus)

                                They put up a sign reading
                                Dr.Smith & Dr.Jones
                                Hysterias & Posteriors

                                The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

                                So, the docs changed
                                it to read
                                Schizoids & Haemorrhoids

                                This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign to
                                Catatonics and High Colonics

                                • no go.

                                Next, they tried...
                                Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives

                                • thumbs down again.

                                Then came..
                                Minds and Behinds

                                • still no good.

                                Another attempt resulted in...
                                Lost Souls & Butt Holes
                                -unacceptable again!

                                So they tried
                                Analysis & Anal Cysts

                                • not a chance

                                Nuts and Butts

                                • no way

                                Freaks and Cheeks

                                • still no good

                                Loons and Moons

                                • forget it!

                                Almost at their wits end, the docs finally came up with:
                                Dr.Smith & Dr.Jones
                                Specializing in Odds & Ends.

                                Everyone loved it.

                                The journey is the objective.

                                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • J
                                  Jett129
                                  見習いボス
                                  Joined:

                                  Great joke. Read it as fast as I could to get to the worthwhile punchline.

                                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • GilesG
                                    Giles
                                    IHUK Crew
                                    Joined:

                                    Yeah, me too…..

                                    "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • Y
                                      Yogi217
                                      Joined:

                                      That was worth it. Thank you

                                      Sent from my SM-N975U1 using Tapatalk

                                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • J
                                        Jett129
                                        見習いボス
                                        Joined:

                                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • J
                                          Jett129
                                          見習いボス
                                          Joined:

                                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • J
                                            Jett129
                                            見習いボス
                                            Joined:

                                            Couldn’t resist…

                                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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