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    Iron Heart Fall/Winter 2025 Collection Preview - Now Live

    That's Jokes

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    • J
      Jett129
      見習いボス
      Joined:

      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • J
        Jett129
        見習いボス
        Joined:

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        • ROmanR
          ROman
          Haraki san Prodigy
          Joined:

          A woman goes into a tackle shop to buy a fishing rod and reel for her grandson's birthday.

          She doesn't know which one to get, so she just takes a mid priced one and goes over to the counter.

          The salesman is standing there wearing dark glasses.

          She says, excuse me. I'm looking for a gift for my 10 year old grandson and wonder whether this would be a good buy as his first rod/reel.

          He says Madam, I'm completely blind, but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.

          She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.

          He says, that's a two metre Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 5-kg test line. It's a good all around combination, ideal for a first rod / reel and your in luck as it's on sale this week for only $43.99.

          She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it." As she opens her purse, she doesn't notice as her Visa card drops on the floor. Oh it sounds like you've dropped your credit card, says the salesman and it sounds to me like a Visa.

          Amazed by the acuity of his hearing she bends down to pick up the card and in doing so accidently farts. At first she is really embarrassed but then realizes there is no way the blind salesman could tell it was her who had farted.

          The salesman rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $58.48 please."

          The woman is totally confused by this and asks, Didn't you just tell me it was on sale for $43.99? How did it suddenly become $58.50?

          The salesman replies, The duck caller is $10.99 and the fish bait is $3.50.

          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • gaseousclayG
            gaseousclay
            Joined:

            duck caller [emoji23]

            Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

            WTB:
            IHSH-129 size L (blue)
            IHSH-19

            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • J
              Jett129
              見習いボス
              Joined:

              Great joke!!!

              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • GilesG
                Giles
                IHUK Crew
                Joined:

                Boom….

                "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • bryaneidins70B
                  bryaneidins70
                  Iron Heart Deity
                  Joined:

                  'Fail we may…Sail we must'

                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • J
                    Jett129
                    見習いボス
                    Joined:

                    One of my all time favorite jokes. I tell a little bit different version,but the punchline is the same.

                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • organisysO
                      organisys
                      Raw and Unwashed
                      Joined:

                      😃

                      Pride of Japan :-)

                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • GilesG
                        Giles
                        IHUK Crew
                        Joined:

                        I may have posted this one before, if so, I'm not even sorry… 😃 😃 😃 😃

                        "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • J
                          Jett129
                          見習いボス
                          Joined:

                          Love that joke,makes me laugh every time.

                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • motojoboboM
                            motojobobo
                            啓蒙家
                            Joined:

                            The journey is the objective.

                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • J
                              Jett129
                              見習いボス
                              Joined:

                              Any Mitch Hedberg fans?

                              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • J
                                Jett129
                                見習いボス
                                Joined:

                                This is from his last set before the lockdown in March.

                                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • motojoboboM
                                  motojobobo
                                  啓蒙家
                                  Joined:

                                  Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time & decided that in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to
                                  share office space…

                                  Dr.Smith was a psychiatrist & Dr.Jones
                                  was a Proctologist (related to colon, anus)

                                  They put up a sign reading
                                  Dr.Smith & Dr.Jones
                                  Hysterias & Posteriors

                                  The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

                                  So, the docs changed
                                  it to read
                                  Schizoids & Haemorrhoids

                                  This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign to
                                  Catatonics and High Colonics

                                  • no go.

                                  Next, they tried...
                                  Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives

                                  • thumbs down again.

                                  Then came..
                                  Minds and Behinds

                                  • still no good.

                                  Another attempt resulted in...
                                  Lost Souls & Butt Holes
                                  -unacceptable again!

                                  So they tried
                                  Analysis & Anal Cysts

                                  • not a chance

                                  Nuts and Butts

                                  • no way

                                  Freaks and Cheeks

                                  • still no good

                                  Loons and Moons

                                  • forget it!

                                  Almost at their wits end, the docs finally came up with:
                                  Dr.Smith & Dr.Jones
                                  Specializing in Odds & Ends.

                                  Everyone loved it.

                                  The journey is the objective.

                                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • J
                                    Jett129
                                    見習いボス
                                    Joined:

                                    Great joke. Read it as fast as I could to get to the worthwhile punchline.

                                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • GilesG
                                      Giles
                                      IHUK Crew
                                      Joined:

                                      Yeah, me too…..

                                      "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • Y
                                        Yogi217
                                        Joined:

                                        That was worth it. Thank you

                                        Sent from my SM-N975U1 using Tapatalk

                                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • J
                                          Jett129
                                          見習いボス
                                          Joined:

                                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • J
                                            Jett129
                                            見習いボス
                                            Joined:

                                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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