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    Iron Heart Fall/Winter 2025 Collection Preview - Now Live

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    • GeoG
      Geo
      Joined:

      long story as briefly as possible

      in my twenties - my beautiful wife and i were practising being pelvically affiliated (your phrase i think?) - her on top - when the distance between pelvises became a little too remote and there was a disconnect for a second before she came back down . . . then there was was a fairly audible 'snap' and a muffled yelp on my part

      light on - check - nothing untoward looking . . . but with passion dampened, sleep time

      got up in the morning, went to the loo and nearly shit myself before i made it there . . . passed a mirror and there was puple/black bruising from above my waist to midway down my thighs . . . and some hugely impressive swelling

      phoned doc for emergency appointment - was told only a locum available - said fine, and set off (wearing loose sweatpants) . . . more than a little worried

      got to surgery - and told to go see Doctor whoever - went to room, walked in to find young female doc (jeez . . . it had to be!)

      'sit down and tell me what's up?' she says

      'well . . .' says i, and repeats the top bit

      'mmmmm - ok, then i guess i'll need to have a look'

      i stand up and drop the sweatpants and she literally jumps backward in her seat with a start - 'you need to go to hospital' . . . now i am really worried

      so a&e at hospital - now i've got to explain to receptionist what the issue is . . . the worry, pain and embarrassment is getting worser and worser

      now getting to see specialist . . . another female . . . who has a look, is visibly startled and goes out the room only to return with a colleague and a nurse . . . both female . . . oh well i'm getting used to it now

      so after much ado, and every medically affiliated woman in glasgow having a good look at my predickament it turns out i had torn the suspensory ligament

      6 weeks for the bruising alone to disappear

      Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity

      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • GilesG
        Giles
        IHUK Crew
        Joined:

        Ouch

          • He's a walking medical disaster

        "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • Finn666F
          Finn666
          Joined:

          well as long as little Geo is enjoying the show it`s all good… 🙂

          jk.get well soon mate!

          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • SeulS
            Seul
            Joined:

            Holy cow Geo… I literally felt my balls shrinking as I read that... All they way down to tennisball size!..

            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • GeoG
              Geo
              Joined:

              Giles - thanks for your support as ever . . .

              Finn - absolutely no worries on that part 😉

              Seul - tennis ball size? You must be very frustrated . . .

              Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity

              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • SeulS
                Seul
                Joined:

                Yeah - finding fitting boxers is hell!..

                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • jimmyJ
                  jimmy
                  Joined:

                  From now on I am on top.

                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • GilesG
                    Giles
                    IHUK Crew
                    Joined:

                    You're in luck Geo…................

                    "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • GeoG
                      Geo
                      Joined:

                      @Seul:

                      Yeah - finding fitting boxers is hell!..

                      . . . Sounds like finding suitable outlets is too!

                      Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity

                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • rocketR
                        rocket
                        Joined:

                        just read through this, Geo Geo…. having a hugh kopfkino (mental cinema) now  😉 ...I can probably a tiny bit empathize your pains, since little rocket managed to get a bruising some year back as well, little sport accident.... and that alone was painful enough.....

                        rocketrocksrox 🤙🏼🤙🏾

                        It's all humbug, like everywhere
                        R.I.P. Geo

                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • GilesG
                          Giles
                          IHUK Crew
                          Joined:

                          For a moment, I thought you said a little squirt accident…..............

                          "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • GeoG
                            Geo
                            Joined:

                            Lol

                            Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity

                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • rocketR
                              rocket
                              Joined:

                              not really…  😉

                              rocketrocksrox 🤙🏼🤙🏾

                              It's all humbug, like everywhere
                              R.I.P. Geo

                              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • O
                                Omega Man
                                Haraki san Student
                                Joined:

                                Geeze Geo, you are walking medical dictionary  😉  Can't imagine the pain…....It could be the other way around, like constant arousal (as in the movie Love and Other Drug). I am sure the female doctors, nurses will get a kick out of it.

                                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • GilesG
                                  Giles
                                  IHUK Crew
                                  Joined:

                                  And opticians….........

                                  "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • GeoG
                                    Geo
                                    Joined:

                                    it wasn't actually that painful after the event . . . useless - yes, but not painful

                                    anyway it's a better story told with a few beers  😉

                                    . . . and yes, i guess i've got more scars and had more broken bones than most, but i've survived so far . . .  :-\

                                    Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity

                                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • Finn666F
                                      Finn666
                                      Joined:


                                      Cheers Stubborn Crew 😉

                                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • Madame ButtonflyM
                                        Madame Buttonfly
                                        IHUK Crew
                                        Joined:

                                        Cheers, Finn!

                                        *Mme B wonders if G will notice if she slips away to sit in garden with lovely, cold beer… :-\

                                        AKA Mrs G

                                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • Finn666F
                                          Finn666
                                          Joined:

                                          post pics if he doesn`t  :P…

                                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • P
                                            premo
                                            Joined:

                                            Wouldn't he join ya if he noticed?

                                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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