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    • mclaincauseyM
      mclaincausey
      見習いボス
      Joined:

      Yeah @Filthy , so many destructive patterns are that way, and unfortunately I can say that from firsthand experience. I hope you find some local folks you like to be around. I am an introvert with a low tolerance for human foibles, so it takes energy for me to hang–but luckily I enjoy the folks I hang with when I occasion to hang with em, and that makes a huge difference. So does my dog! And so does art (ironically, often depressing music).

      Think it, be it.

      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • Filthy2123ozjunkieF
        Filthy2123ozjunkie
        見習いボスー
        Joined:

        Thanks for the meaningful responses. I have a hard time articulating what I am thinking sometimes so this is why I am so brief. Yes, I need to try and figure something out. The doctor in that video suggests forcing yourself to go out and at least go to places you enjoy. Maybe I will give that a shot? Thanks a lot for taking the time to talk to me, because it means a lot. I really appreciate all of the people I get to talk to here. Cheers @mclaincausey

        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • S
          sabergirl
          見習いボス
          Joined:

          I have always been a solitary sort, @Filthy, so I definitely identify.  Most of the things I like to do, like reading, riding my bike, hiking, crafting, are by nature lonely activities.  I find that I feel a lot less lonely going about my hermetic existence in public–when I go to the café or the bar to read, for example.  I also try to walk at the public park where I'm around other humans.  It helps that I have a pretty social job.  Before I had a partner I was often very lonely, and felt a little isolated at times--but it was definitely a big help to be out among people, so I tried not to just nest in my house every day and night, and I think it made a difference.

          I've also often found that it relieves a bit of loneliness to talk to people online!  So here we are.  😃

          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • Filthy2123ozjunkieF
            Filthy2123ozjunkie
            見習いボスー
            Joined:

            @sabergirl hmm that would be cool to find a bar I could read a book at. Most of the places I go to are pretty low brow. I do spend a lot of time looking at pictures of clothing and cats when I go to the bar though. I am afraid people think I am looking at Facebook just like everyone else. I tried checking out meetup but I didn't find any groups that were similar to my interests. Plus I have to leave home for work all the time, so it is hard to maintain even the most casual of friendships.

            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • ChrisC
              Chris
              Raw and Unwashed
              Joined:

              My wife tells me that the research seems to to indicate that online interaction doesn't take the place of human interaction.  And that interaction with your spouse isn't enough- apparently, we need honest to god, real world friends, too.

              So I guess I'm doomed to an early death, too, filthy…

              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • gaseousclayG
                gaseousclay
                Joined:

                @Chris:

                So I guess I'm doomed to an early death, too, filthy…

                Me three

                Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

                WTB:
                IHSH-129 size L (blue)
                IHSH-19

                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • UnTuckedU
                  UnTucked
                  Joined:

                  @Chris:

                  ….. research seems to to indicate that online interaction doesn't take the place of human interaction.  And that interaction with your spouse isn't enough- apparently, we need honest to god, real world friends, too.

                  So I guess I'm doomed to an early death, too, filthy...

                  Sounds like I should be dying any day now… Outside of conversation with my ex-wife and children, I routinely go an entire week without saying more than a simple  "Hello" to anyone except my wife, and that's including work as well......

                  In search of:
                  IHV-04, med.
                  IHSH-185, large
                  IHSH-186, large (khaki, and green)

                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • C
                    Crit_Obs
                    Joined:

                    Hello HA (Hermites Anonymous), I'm a new member and I have no meaningful human interaction with anyone except my wife and if you ask her even that is debatable. ::) I'm a student so lots of forced interaction with all sorts of folks but that's something I'd rather not. I don't know if I'm lonely but people being good friends with people seems like a bit of an alien concept.

                    Having said that, I'd have no hard objections to friending people I genuinely like; I guess it's just a case of such people being hard to come by.

                    Either that or it's me who is a c*nt. ::)

                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • DougNgD
                      DougNg
                      Joined:

                      The video doesn't show but I can attest that since I started to work alone:

                      1. my blood pressure is finally down to a normal level
                      2. I've stopped grinding my teeth when I sleep
                      3. my overall mood has improved
                      4. my kitchen appliances have remained dent free

                      So whatever Dr. Murthy had to say, I'm pretty much going to ignore it.

                      I know violence is not the answer, I got it wrong on purpose

                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • ChrisC
                        Chris
                        Raw and Unwashed
                        Joined:

                        @UnTucked:

                        I routinely go an entire week without saying more than a simple  "Hello" to anyone except my wife, and that's including work as well…...

                        I can legitimately go days without even seeing a co-worker, much less speaking to one.

                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • UnTuckedU
                          UnTucked
                          Joined:

                          @Chris:

                          @UnTucked:

                          I routinely go an entire week without saying more than a simple  "Hello" to anyone except my wife, and that's including work as well…...

                          I can legitimately go days without even seeing a co-worker, much less speaking to one.

                          Whoa… that might be a bit much for me.

                          I prefer my "alone" in the general vicinity of other humans, I just don't want to have to interact with those other humans.

                          Example:
                          We've stopped going to our favorite Thai restaurant because we became regulars, so the owner and his wife always want to chat with us for like 5mins before taking our order… As delicious as the food is, it's still not worth those 5 awkward minutes to me.

                          In search of:
                          IHV-04, med.
                          IHSH-185, large
                          IHSH-186, large (khaki, and green)

                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • SeulS
                            Seul
                            Joined:

                            @UnTucked:

                            As delicious as the food is, it's still not worth those 5 awkward minutes to me.

                            That's just common sense.

                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • Matty123M
                              Matty123
                              Raw and Unwashed
                              Joined:

                              This conversation actually proves the  possible truth in @mclaincausey post. A group of self proclaimed reclusiive people talking to each other about their not needing or wanting to talk to people. It’s ok guys. You  all want and need love and I love you all 🥰😍😘

                              Maybe so. Maybe not

                              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • SeulS
                                Seul
                                Joined:

                                Piss off.

                                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • UnTuckedU
                                  UnTucked
                                  Joined:

                                  @Seul:

                                  @UnTucked:

                                  As delicious as the food is, it's still not worth those 5 awkward minutes to me.

                                  That's just common sense.

                                  I forgot to mention the 25% "You guys come here all the time" discount…..

                                  But thanks for making me feel less dick-ish, lol

                                  In search of:
                                  IHV-04, med.
                                  IHSH-185, large
                                  IHSH-186, large (khaki, and green)

                                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • Matty123M
                                    Matty123
                                    Raw and Unwashed
                                    Joined:

                                    @Seul:

                                    Piss off.

                                    The truth is often met with anger. You can’t stop this love fest.

                                    Maybe so. Maybe not

                                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • louisboscoL
                                      louisbosco
                                      啓蒙家
                                      Joined:

                                      and then there's me, who can't seem to shut the fuck up ever since i learnt to speak…

                                      my school report cards always seem to say

                                      "Louis is a great student. He just needs to talk less and listen more" or "paying more attention in class would make him excel further" or "good student but needs to learn to know the right time to speak"

                                      "Loyalty is a two way street. If i'm asking for it from you, then you're getting it from me."

                                      • Harvey Specter
                                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • ChrisC
                                        Chris
                                        Raw and Unwashed
                                        Joined:

                                        @Seul:

                                        @UnTucked:

                                        As delicious as the food is, it's still not worth those 5 awkward minutes to me.

                                        That's just common sense.

                                        Agreed.

                                        And I've done the same thing at a couple of area restaurants and the convenience store by my office.

                                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • Filthy2123ozjunkieF
                                          Filthy2123ozjunkie
                                          見習いボスー
                                          Joined:

                                          I found this awesome channel of mostly old US military propaganda style videos on YouTube last night. There old videos on etiquette, boiler design, old cars, top secret jets, and other declassified propaganda and military training films.

                                          https://www.youtube.com/user/webdev17

                                          One of the cool videos I saw:

                                          Depending on what country you're in, some of the videos may be considered NSFW.

                                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • mikebarhootM
                                            mikebarhoot
                                            Iron Heart Deity
                                            Joined:

                                            @Seul:

                                            Piss off.

                                            Ditto and i like the way you think!

                                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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