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    • scarfmaceS
      scarfmace
      Haraki san Expert
      Joined:

      A man enters the doctors office asking the doctor what he can do to make sure he lives as long as possible.
      The doctor agrees and starts off with: No smoking.
      The man eagerly reacts that he hasn’t even touched a cigarette in his life.

      "Not too much alcohol", the doctor continues.

      "Never even had a sip in my life doctor, I will never let it enter my body, no sir."

      Ok then, the doc says and continues with: “be careful with fatty foods and red meat.”
      The man gets all wound up and explains  he has been vegan most his life and eating animals is murder.

      The doctor scratches his head, thinks for a second and finally says: "you know, changing sexual partners to often can have a negative effect on your life expectancy."

      And yet again, the man tells the doctor that he has never been in any form of a sexual relationship, its better this way, he says, other people just hold me back.

      The doctor takes of his glasses, and tells the man he should life a long and healthy life if he continues down his current path. However, he says: “just before you go, can I ask you something?”

      "Yes doctor", the man replies.

      The doc sais: “Why in the world would you want to live so long?”

      "It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."

      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • vaquero357V
        vaquero357
        Banned
        Joined:

        …sent this picture to a friend of mine. 🙂

        …almost immediately he sent back 'war pigs'. 😃 😃

        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • GilesG
          Giles
          IHUK Crew
          Joined:

          "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • goosehdG
            goosehd
            Mod Squad
            Joined:

            😃 😃

            "I don't give a shit what anyone else is doing, we will do what is best for us and our customers" - Giles P. :)

            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • WlemonW
              Wlemon
              Haraki san Expert
              Joined:

              Oh, man. That's good, @Giles.

              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • KasiK
                Kasi
                見習いボス
                Joined:

                Ha ha ha

                Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

                Not an admin. Not a mod. But the guy whose fits turn heads and whose name comes up when people ask, “how should this piece fit?” 🖕

                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • KasiK
                  Kasi
                  見習いボス
                  Joined:

                  Not an admin. Not a mod. But the guy whose fits turn heads and whose name comes up when people ask, “how should this piece fit?” 🖕

                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • RoxRocks86R
                    RoxRocks86
                    Raw and Unwashed
                    Joined:

                    😃

                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • Filthy2123ozjunkieF
                      Filthy2123ozjunkie
                      見習いボスー
                      Joined:

                      I was thinking about Giles' cat and was reminded of this. The thing about Giles' cat is: you just want to love him.

                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • J
                        Jett129
                        見習いボス
                        Joined:

                        Really good one,made me laugh a couple of times. @Filthy

                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • Filthy2123ozjunkieF
                          Filthy2123ozjunkie
                          見習いボスー
                          Joined:

                          😃 😃 😉

                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • J
                            Jett129
                            見習いボス
                            Joined:

                            Thought this was brilliant. 

                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • goosehdG
                              goosehd
                              Mod Squad
                              Joined:

                              Rearrange the letters to spell out an important part of the human body which is even more useful when erect.

                              P N E S I

                              People who wrote SPINE became doctors…

                              The rest are mainly one track mind IH members.

                              "I don't give a shit what anyone else is doing, we will do what is best for us and our customers" - Giles P. :)

                              last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • endoE
                                endo
                                見習いボス
                                Joined:

                                😃 😃 😃    and no, despite being a doc I seem to be one track minded

                                si tacuisses

                                last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • GilesG
                                  Giles
                                  IHUK Crew
                                  Joined:

                                  So, @endo your forum name more appropriately would be urol…

                                  "OK face up to it - you're useless but generally pretty honest and straightforward . . . it's a rare combination of qualities that I have come to admire in you" - Geo 2011

                                  last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • endoE
                                    endo
                                    見習いボス
                                    Joined:

                                    😉 neurol, actually

                                    si tacuisses

                                    last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • goosehdG
                                      goosehd
                                      Mod Squad
                                      Joined:

                                      @endo

                                      "I don't give a shit what anyone else is doing, we will do what is best for us and our customers" - Giles P. :)

                                      last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • ChrisC
                                        Chris
                                        Raw and Unwashed
                                        Joined:

                                        Urol, neurol; either way, that's what I do all my thinking with.

                                        last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • endoE
                                          endo
                                          見習いボス
                                          Joined:

                                          @goosehd & @Chris  well yeah, I guess that's just the way it is  🙂

                                          si tacuisses

                                          last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • ?
                                            A Former User
                                            Joined:

                                            The April fools jokes are slappin’

                                            last edited by 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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