Parenting
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@Tago-Mago I think we will need to hire a parenting tutor to figure it out. I miss simple
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@GoodtimeJohnny I have a 4-year-old and 6-year-old and I’m already dreading the day they’ll leave for college. Friends with adult kids have assured me that I’ll be happy to watch them move on and grow up. It’s just very difficult to imagine when they’re still cute little kids.
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@americanathreads my advice would just be to take off as much time from work as you possibly can. For me that meant three months with one of those months unpaid. Pulled it off for both kids. I would do it all over again.
Also — I never could even imagine what having a kid was like until the moment my first one was born. As soon as I saw her, the love was so deep and meaningful. Like seeing a color I’d never known existed. Second time, wham, exact same thing, like a baseball bat of love upside the head. Tears streaming. Like an ancient invisible force.
I realize it’s different for everyone, but I mention in case you’re like I was and having trouble imagining how the connection might occur.
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@GoodtimeJohnny Good to know!! One thing I’ve learned from this parenting journey is that I really have no idea what to expect.
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@maple_texas You really do have to prepare for the unexpected and be ready for it to not happen all while staying calm, nonthreateneing, and collected. I love my conversations with them now because they'll tell you something amazing happening like you would talk to a friend or coworker but in the back of my head I still hear the little kid voice explaining why they should stay up! It's truly an honor to be my kids Dad by far the best adventure I've ever been on and it's still going 20 years later!
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I suppose my generation, Gen X, and the ones around it definitely coddle their kids more than the Baby Boomers did, but I just saw one of the most ridiculous examples I’ve seen in a long time.
I built a little pocket neighborhood across from a private school on a very quiet side street. It’s really only busy during school carpool. One of the residents in the neighborhood just drove her child to school.
The entrance to the school parking lot is maybe 500 feet from their house, and even once you get into the parking lot, the school itself is probably only another few hundred feet.
This child isn’t 8 or 9. He’s a 14 year old boy who is taller than I am.
I’m pretty sure at 14 I would have been embarrassed if my parents even offered to drive me that distance.
Edit: because I have to figure out everything in my life. I just walked it. It was 217 steps.
@selveldgesteps
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@GoodtimeJohnny sounds amazing. This is the wildest journey I’ve ever embarked upon.
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@maple_texas really appreciate the comment, man!
I work in our family business so it’s a little bit complex. I’ll take 4 weeks and then soon after it’s Christmas so I might nearly get 6-8 weeks close together.
Yes trying to imagine that feeling and meeting him right now feels so abstract. Anticipating how big a moment is right around the corner is hard to wrap the head around!
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@americanathreads For sure, abstract is the best way to put it. I was the same way.
True story: when my wife was pregnant, i was looking at our dogs and thinking, “How could a baby be more cute than a puppy?” I just didn’t understand. Of course, I was just in the dark. I think it’s because I’d only ever known other people’s babies and it’s just not even close to the same thing, at least for me.
When someone would bring a baby to the office, I was never the one to run up and look. Now it’s the opposite, but if I’m being honest, it’s mostly because it reminds me of my kids. Even all this talk is bringing me back.
Totally get that everyone’s work situation is different, but that’s a big chunk of time. I hope the best for you man! Talking about this just brings me back. Hope you can share a pic of the little dude!
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@americanathreads said in Parenting:
If anyone has any good recommendations around birth/newborn phase that would be great.
In my experience, newborns do 3 things: Eat, sleep, and crap. Mum will take care of Eat. You can help with sleep and crap to help out Mum. Keep Mum happy and she'll keep baby happy and then you'll be happy.
Get out as much as possible in the first 4-6 months. Until around then, they're basically potatoes and are surprisingly easy to take places.
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Echo the above really
If possible when the baby sleeps try to sleep also, I think I ran on empty for the first few weeks Jacob was home from the hospital but he was a prem baby and did 6 weeks in the hospital after birthOh and nappies wipes etc got pretty expensive
Also don’t listen to the sales people in the baby stores, I think I could have kitted out a wardrobe with only IH for all the stuff we got told we needed and in reality didn’t at all
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