Random Rants
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I got road rage today and I was really disappointed with myself. I had to wait for 2 lights at a stop and I was like, "would you c'mon! Please f'n go!"
I tried going to the post office to mail my buddy some shoes and it was closed, so I left… then I drove to a store that was no longer there, now 25 miles further away in a different direction... then I went to the car wash and there was a long line, so I left... then I went to the bar, and it was gonna be an hour for a table- so I left.
Serotonin is currently on empty.
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Don’t beat yourself up. That sounds like it sucks. I can guarantee you I would’ve felt the same way. Sometimes it’s damned if you do damned if you don’t. This too shall pass.
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Thanks @adam313 all I could do is laugh. How are you feeling?
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I’m laughing at the absurdity of the misfortune lately too, it’s almost predictable at this point. That perspective is helping to limit my reactivity. Obviously it’s not fool proof, as we all saw this week when I failed miserably. I’m trying to evolve.
My vision was 20/600 Wednesday night. Today I finally feel like I’ve turned the corner. Vision is still blurry-ish but getting better. Can’t complain. Happy to be able to see again. Don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone as they say. Thanks for asking!
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My wife went to the grocery store with both of our kids (5 and 2) because she wanted to give me some grad school study time in peace. She calls me to come down to the store because she had to abandon a full cart and take them both out of there because they don't know how to act in public (thanks covid!).
It was either I come down there and watch them or basically come back from an hour grocery trip empty-handed, so I went. This evening after dinner she had to go back to the same damn grocery store because that's where the pharmacy is.
Kids: huge freaking time wasters, so @Filthy I feel your pain, that shit drives me nuts. I hate wasting time, food, and electricity, probably in that order.
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Yeah that sounds like a pain in the butt. Sorry you're having a bad day as well @tvenuto
Although, I will admit something deeply personal to you: I am envious of all you guys here that have these beautiful families. I feel like the opportunity for that to transpire in my life has passed me by, and I am relegated (by my own doing) to have short abrupt relationships with girls who are damaged goods, or other serious issues. Same goes for all my friends. All the friends I have had are all bad news and doing stuff I don't want to be associated with now. So I don't really have any friends (except a few guys I am casually acquainted with at work).
So this is why I am so grateful for this place and being able to talk to everyone here. This past year I have felt so isolated and I am grateful to be able to talk to people here.
I am only admitting this publicly because I am sure there are others here going through the same deal as me. Feel free to drop me a PM if you want someone to talk to, like judgement-free zone.
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Yea it's a double edged sword. At this very moment, my wife is yelling at my daughter for not listening and generally being an inflexible control-freak, my daughter is yelling at my son for peeing on her floor (because he's escaped naked after his bath with no diaper), and the new rescue cat is cowering under a bed where he has been cowering all day because the kids have been absolute animals constantly. Moments from now, I will draw the ire of my wife for cowering in the sun room and posting this instead of helping the chaos that is currently unfolding.
I think chris rock might have said it best: "Married and bored, or single and lonely, ain't no happiness nowhere!"
That being said I feel extremely grateful for all of it, and don't regret for a second the life I chose. Like you said, you get pissed, then you laugh, then you move on.
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Yikes.
maybe the grass isn't greener? -
2 minutes ago…
Me: chest and face on ground, looking for cat under bed, feel something soaking into shirt
Me (to daughter): "Where did [son] pee?"
Daughter: "I don't know"
Me: "I heard you say he peed, where did he pee?"
"I…uh...don't remember..."
Me: "Did [son] pee right here?"
"….yes." -
LMAO I'm sorry. Yeah I don't know if I am man enough to deal with that.
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Parenthood teaches you pretty quickly how to be pragmatic about the disgusting things- liquid, solid, and every variation in between- that come out of children.
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That's the truth, this doesn't even faze at this point. I'll spare the details but my son is at the apex of cute and gross, any cuter kid isn't a gross, any grosser kid isn't as cute. He's just started being a little sh*t, though. He's right at that mid to late 2 stage where you can't get him to do anything, punishments don't compute, but he's got the ability to make trouble. If the pandemic was starting now, instead of last year, only two of the three following things would have survived: my wife, my kids, my marriage.
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It's probably why I am so messed up… but my mom used to give me the silent treatment when I did something wrong. It doesn't matter who, but it still drives me crazy. Whether it be my not-so-sweetie-anymore or the music thread here. When people dont respond I like mentally implode.
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Yeah I need to not be so self-critical. But I was raised catholic so self-loathing and hardcore orthodox Catholicism go hand-in-hand
